Funeral Rites
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Shaping Cultural Experiences
Travel has been an integral part of my life since I was a young child. I grew up in a multicultural, bilingual home in the Netherlands with a Polish mother and a Dutch father. My
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- May 10, 2012
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Update & BBC News Link
A brief update: One interview video will be uploaded tomorrow evening. I believe the BBC News One-Minute World News provides well-balanced reporting of news, hence why I wanted to share it. Top stories on May
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- May 11, 2012
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From Nigeria to Boston
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9VNkCazT_T4&feature=youtu.be
When you first meet Oluwagbeminiyi Osidipe, you encounter a very vibrant, friendly, and unique personality. Oluwagbeminiyi or Niyi – as she shortened her name for simplicity – was named by her mother, who had a “very personal experience” when she had her, Niyi explained. Niyi is a Yoruba Nigerian transplant who arrived in the U.S. in 2006. As one of the most densely populated (West) African countries, Nigeria derives its name from the river that spans its land. To the South, it borders the Gulf of Guinea to the Atlantic Ocean. Originally colonized by the British, Nigeria gained independence in 1960. Its main ethnic groups are the Hausa, Igbo and Yoruba, who speak English and their own respective languages, while major religions include Islam, Christianity and indigenous beliefs. Niyi shares her story, her views on politics, cultural differences she’s embraced with humor, and what we can learn from each other by expressing curiosity. Her message is simple: travel enriches us through its exposure to new cultures, and enables us to grow.
- 13878 Views
- May 16, 2012
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Mark Twain on Travel
“Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts. Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things cannot be acquired by vegetating in one little corner of the earth all one’s lifetime.” (American author Mark Twain, Innocents Abroad).
Have you had the opportunity to travel (extensively, within your country, or even once abroad)? Can you relate to Twain’s sentiments? How does travel enrich us?
- 13970 Views
- May 19, 2012
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Pleasing The Taste Palate
Food has the wonderful quality of uniting us no matter where we are. There is nothing partisan or narrow-minded about food. It simply invites us to indulge, create recipes, and share with others. Two of my favorite Polish dishes (included in collage) are pierogies and barszcz czerwony – a beetroot soup – served on Christmas Eve in Poland. How does food bring us together? What are some of your favorite dishes and why? Can food trigger memories?
- 14000 Views
- May 23, 2012
- 2
Stereotypes: Truth or Fiction?
DEFINING STEREOTYPES: “An idea or statement about all of the members of a group or all the instances of a situation.” (Merriam-Webster). Stereotypes enable bias and preconceived notions to perpetuate, but can also reveal valid
- 12852 Views
- May 29, 2012
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Annual Human Rights Report
“The world changed immeasurably over the course of 2011. Across the Middle East, North Africa, and far beyond, citizens stood up to demand respect for human dignity, more promising economic opportunities, greater political liberties, and
- 11174 Views
- May 31, 2012
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Euro Crisis & Emerging Stereotypes
Brief Crisis Breakdown Since the onset of the global financial crisis, or Great Recession, in 2007, the Eurozone has feared impending growing global debt levels, as well as sovereign debt within European countries themselves. In
- 11695 Views
- June 4, 2012
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Remembering Tiananmen
Today marks the 23rd anniversary of Tiananmen Square pro-democracy protests in Beijing, China. Inflation, a lack of career prospects, the fall of Eastern European communism, and political corruption, are all said to have fueled anger
- 13339 Views
- June 7, 2012
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Coffee's Uniting Power
A cup of coffee can bridge cultural gaps. At least, that’s what Gizem Salgicil White, founder of Turkayfe.org, believes. Her organization aims to create awareness of Turkish culture, particularly within America. Gizem is a Turkish native,
- 5592 Views
- Guest Blogger
- December 9, 2015
- Local Culture

We had just spent two weeks in Rio de Janeiro, that marvelous city. Exhausted, but happy, we were packing to leave when we received a sad phone call: Rodrigo’s grandmother had died a few hours earlier in Natal.
Her death was not unexpected. At 88 years old, Bisa* Bertha’s health had been deteriorating steadily over the past year. Regardless, everyone was struck by the loss.
Rodrigo told me that we’d arrive *just in time* for the funeral. This news surprised me. How had my mother-in-law organized everything so fast? And how could other family members attend with such short notice? It was a weekday in early January, don’t they have to work?
He told me we’d be picked up at the airport and go straight to the cemetery. Dismayed, I looked at our outfits. We were in casual shorts and t-shirts, smelled vaguely of sunscreen, and only some of us had bathed that morning. I knew we didn’t have any formal-wear in our suitcases and was horrified that we’d be attending this important event looking as we did. “It’ll be fine,” Rodrigo assured me, “nobody will care what we look like, they’ll just be glad we’re there.”
We arrived minutes before the ceremony. By this time, Bisa had been dead for a mere 7 hours. But there she was, dressed to the nines in her coffin, surrounded by wailing daughters and acres of flowers. Wreaths were draped with banners stating the names of the mourners. One said “dearest grandmother, we’ll miss you” and contained my name along with my husband’s. (My sister-in-law had ordered it while we were in flight.)
The small room was jam-packed with family, neighbors, friends, and church members, all dressed in their finest. (Just as I’d feared, we stuck out in our vacation attire.) Two religious officials spoke, while my mother-in-law and her sisters patted Bertha’s face, smoothed her hair, and held her hand. Grandkids and great-grandkids came to the coffin to kiss her forehead or cheek. I’d never seen so much touching of a deceased person.
About 40 minutes later the coffin was closed and moved out to where Bertha’s husband, Biso* Raimundo, had been laid to rest a few years ago. The attendees followed. A short prayer was murmured, and the coffin was lowered into the ground. Cemetery workers placed heavy slabs of concrete upon it, and began shoveling dirt over top, all while we stood there. Gradually, people began to leave. Hugs, kisses, tears and handkerchiefs were shared.
And then it was done.
From death to burial, the whole situation was over in about 9 hours.
As an in-law to this giant family, this funeral was touching and beautiful. As an American, it was culturally fascinating. Many things I’d come to associate with of death ceremonies and rituals in my homeland aren’t part of the Brazilian experience.
In the US, the funeral would be scheduled for several days or even several weeks after a loved one’s death. This allows family members to take time off work or travel from afar. (Although Judaism calls for quick burial of the deceased, so this may not be true for Jewish Americans.)
In contrast, Brazilians usually bury people within 24 hours of their passing. An article in Brazil Business explains that this might be because bodies decompose quickly in tropical weather. Alternatively, maybe it’s because Brazilians “concentrate all their despair and pain in the funeral and from this perspective, it is a good thing that [it is fast and short]”.
Telling stories about the deceased is a key part of American funerals. Officiants speak about the person’s life, sometimes getting quite detailed about their hobbies, personality quirks, successes, and community involvement. Family members and guests are invited to share their memories through eulogies, toasts, and guest books. Slide-shows, photo collages and videos are also displayed.

Brazilian funerals are overseen by religious officials who mention some details about the deceased’s life and accomplishments, but they focus more on prayer, descriptions of life-in-the-hereafter, and comforting words for the family. A family member or friend might share a very brief eulogy, but generally guests do not speak at the service.
A growing number of US families host memorial services or “Celebrations of Life” instead of a public funeral. These events are like parties, with food and drink as a big part of the day. Sometimes meals are catered, other times guests help by bringing pot-luck dishes.
In Brazil, guests don’t expect any food or drink to be served. Brazilians feel that the mourning family should not have to worry about feeding others during their time of grief and loss.
Without passing judgment on one set of death rituals over another, I found it amazing how very different the Brazilian rites were from those I’ve experienced in the US.I recognize that both Brazil and the US are nations of immigrants – surely there are more types of ceremonies in each nation than I’ve personally experienced. But in the end, death is a certainty we all face, regardless of citizenship, religion, or race. People have developed rituals to cope with grief and loss the world over, and I’m grateful for the opportunity to have observed a different way first hand.
Bisa is short for Bisavó, great-grandmother. Biso is short for Bisavô, great-grandfather. These are nicknames my children used for my husband’s grandparents.
Gretchen Richter de Medeiros is Chief Planner and Writer at www.LearnLiveTravel.com. She has recently returned from an 11-month around the world trip with her husband, teen children and friend/teacher. Travel is her passion. Inspiring people to live their dreams is her goal. Follow her on Twitter @RDMgoRTW.
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